The more i'm into them and their songs and the fandom, the more sicken i've become. And now i'm on the edge of saying, i had enough!
I don't even want to write the lyrics into my blog.
Here's the link if u want to know what i'm going to talk about...
http://www.kpoplyrics.net/bts-miss-right-lyrics-english-romanized.html
Miss right huh, right...
This one sentence makes me ponder;
"I never believed that there was a god"
Am I stanning the right group?
Or to be honest, the real question is
"what's good in kpop for human of belief?"
Some groups are fake, puppet of the company, singing songs that r given to them, performing as what the ceo wants or what the fans r craving for..
But for bts, they make their own songs so i cant help but being more judgmental when it comes to their lyrics
They speak what's in their mind
So really, they didnt believe in god?
Although it is common for non believer to be atheist
They believe their life is of what they work for, their success is due to their own passion and hard work
So they dun feel the purpose of having god when they can make things out by themselves
That they forget, how human are made at the first place...
Me, myself sometimes forget the fact that our life is determined by God's plan
That we have to work for as the means of event to be happened but the result is known by The One who created us
So i've been delusional
To keep my mind from thinking the bad things that happened in life, sometimes i choose rather to indulge myself into fangirling or whatnot
So now regarding the fandom
At first i was so in love with army (bts fanclub)
I got new mutuals in twitter
And had great conversations with them
Making great connections..
To having someone who will translate bts video clips namely bangtan bomb, variety shows etc within 2 days or less..
Participating in giveaways although i never win anything
Live updates on bts live performance or concerts..
Having selca days every tuesday..
It was fun...
Later i came across with less educated fans
Who chasing after the boys on street and surround them in the airport
Or those who bickering other fandom or people who involved with bts that not into their likings
Or those who only stan their bias and badmouthed other members
Or those who simply hate.
Most of them are teenagers, high schoolers...
I cant blame them for being immature cause they are young to know more about life
I cant stop that immature people to speak their minds on sns via their fake names
Freedom of speech sometimes overshadowed what matter in life...
So yeah. I had enough of these crappy comments i keep come across while scrolling my twt tl
And loving someone aka bts too much hurts..
One sided love that consume too much of ur time, feelings, money...
And on top of that, i hate myself for being what i am now
For having two faces, online and offline
So who am i to blame those people who hides behind their fake id
Because i am too
If my real friends or my students know who i am online esp on twitter, i dun think i have the courage to meet them as the same again
That's why i always have no-face selcas on armyselcaday, hiding my real face under bunny sticker cause i dun want to be known online as what i am in real life
Too different
Too fake
When i told my kids to spend their time wisely, to study, to behave well, to have discipline in life
While i spend myself online fangirling
It's just too much for me sometimes
Too overwhelming sometimes i just broke into tears because i dunno who's to talk to
As my real life friends dun noe what kind of person i am online
And my mutuals dun noe what kind of person i am offline
Between these two worlds, only God knows what's going on
But i am too sinful sometimes i couldnt bring myself to say anything to Him
I just wish He gives a way out for me from these mess...
I'm not a miss right.
Never be.
I only hope that i'll be what right for me...
Hi. I have read this blog. I don't know. But what you all said was true. We all have two sides. A side where everyone knows about you, and another side that you are the only one knows about it. My friends, my environment, all people that surrounds me knew that I am a really really shy girl. Not gonna talk unless asked to. I am an extrovert. I dont really like being in a crowd. I dont like being in a loud places and many people who might be judging you. BUT the other side of me is a Real Hard FANGIRL of bangtan.. I have accounts but my family and my friends dont know about this.. I really love to show them my love and support thru this account. I make friends( mutuals), I even got to their concert. My parents were shocked about it but they also supported me. My friends also said that they're happy for me. During concert, IT IS HELLA FUN. For the first time, I LOVE BEING IN A CROWD. A crowd where we all have the same interest (well, i love that idea) Bangtan gave me a lot of confidence about myself. I learned not to worry what might people think about me. I learned to stand my beliefs. And now, I am taking my journey and I am full of hope that I can make it.. ❤️❤️ Thank you! I always wanted to share my thoughts so someone. I will read all your blogs. Keep going. It'll inspire many people. Loves lot ~
ReplyDelete@YeddaDianneHart on twitter ❣
Nice
ReplyDelete@baektaeta on twittter
Assalamualaikum, hi again!
ReplyDeleteSo I forgot to add some tips to my comment on Love Me, Not 4. I can see you're a good writer, you have great potential and I know you can be even better! I have three tips for you:
1. Keep on writing.
2. Read a lot.
3. Read writing guides (this can help with language, storyline and your writing style) - I suggest Asianfanfics.com for writing fanfiction, I'm a writer there
So yeaaah. I hope this can help! And I'll be sure to keep up with your story. ^^
Now to leave a genuine comment on this post itself.
Well, I don't know about the other boys but Namjoon is indeed an atheist. I'm thankful that they really respect Islam. Who knows if someday they'll receive hidayaa right? InshaAllah. I'm a fan regardless of their religon, but I'll be the happiest person alive if any of them receive hidayaa. :)
And I also believe that we all have our two sides, online and offline. Some people are happier online, vice versa. But who we really are, well... only Allah AlMighty knows. He knows best.
Everything that He allowed to happen has a reason. Whether it's a good thing or a bad thing, we'll have to realise for ourselves. Each person we meet, each incident that happens, I know that He allowed it for our own good.
Sometimes I have my down moments and ponder on fate, how sinful I am, how lowly I am that I'm frequently worried - what if Allah doesn't hear my prayers because I've wronged him so many times? What if Allah doesn't hear my dzikir because I'm not good at reading the Quran? These thoughts consume me a lot but then I'd realise that as long as I try, as long as I keep my faith strong, Allah will always be there. Allah will never leave. Allah sees, Allah listens. He knows us better than we know ourselves.
Hence, whatever happens, even the small details in life that may make me annoyed or upset, I'll remember that it's for the best. If it's something that's good, it's meant to make me happy and to remind me that I must be grateful. If it's something that isn't so pleasant, it's meant to make me learn from it so a bad thing would not repeat itself.
Likewise with my love for BTS, it can go two ways. It may be a test from Allah, to see if I would ever disobey Him for human musicians, to see if I'd ever cross Him because of my interest, to see if I'd put these men before Rasulullah. But I also take BTS as a blessing - they're a source of my worldly happiness, they're greater company than my own real life friends, they teach me a lot of things about life in this current time.
So, yeah. Whether or not you're stanning the right group, it's entirely up to you. That's what I think. Believing in yourself, leaving life up to Allah and remaining positive can help you in becoming your very own Miss Right. Everybody's Mr/Ms Right, we just need to find that feeling within us.
Keep writing and keep smiling, kak! (Can I call you kak? Hehe ^.^) I pray that you're always happy and successful, in the world and in the hereafter. Let's be friends, inshaAllah.
- @jeonhobi on Twitter, my fanaccount with which I'm joining your GA.
- @NazlinMunira on Twitter, my personal (slightly fan) account that you can contact me with if you want to be friends.
Have a nice day! ^^
@jeonminvjun on twitter *like seriously i forgot to put this thing omg hahaha*
ReplyDeleteokay, based on what ive read, all youre saying are true, well, even me have this two personalities when im online and offline. when im offline, i have to keep the fangirl side of me to myself and be normal, like other people did. Like in my class, i have to be a normal girl who just studyi g and people dont even recognize me as kpopers *malaysian yknow how they be if they spotted kpopers hahaha*
and i guess you alrdy know how i would be if im online right? hahaha and also in addition, we as muslims, sometimes i have this kind of thought where i will always think that, is it worth it to spend my time with this. is it okay? my parents will surely against this if they know. but im just being me, being all stubborn and live my life as youth. is it wrong? our religion doesnt prohibited us to have fun but we do have limits.
okay idrk what im talking about but, we have to realize that we will let go things as the time passed. we just have to treasure every single precious time of our youth, every single time of us being youth.
okay thats all from me thanks kak hana for such inspiring post!
@jeonminvjun on twitter *like seriously i forgot to put this thing omg hahaha*
ReplyDeleteokay, based on what ive read, all youre saying are true, well, even me have this two personalities when im online and offline. when im offline, i have to keep the fangirl side of me to myself and be normal, like other people did. Like in my class, i have to be a normal girl who just studyi g and people dont even recognize me as kpopers *malaysian yknow how they be if they spotted kpopers hahaha*
and i guess you alrdy know how i would be if im online right? hahaha and also in addition, we as muslims, sometimes i have this kind of thought where i will always think that, is it worth it to spend my time with this. is it okay? my parents will surely against this if they know. but im just being me, being all stubborn and live my life as youth. is it wrong? our religion doesnt prohibited us to have fun but we do have limits.
okay idrk what im talking about but, we have to realize that we will let go things as the time passed. we just have to treasure every single precious time of our youth, every single time of us being youth.
okay thats all from me thanks kak hana for such inspiring post!
And on top of that, i hate myself for being what i am now
ReplyDeleteFor having two faces, online and offline
So who am i to blame those people who hides behind their fake id
This line, I'm cryin while reading the last part. I don't know what to say, but I think as long they're respect religions I will continue loving them. The first part is a very sensitive part, I adore you for added this to your blog.
@pache_jenney